5 Things to Know When Your Unofficial Girlfriend is Engaged to Another Guy

Here's a fun story:

Boy meets girl. Girl falls deeply in love. Like deep, DEEP, like she fell, FELL (repetition for emphasis); so deep that she breaks every single bone in her body (If you said bone, BONE, you're a genius).

So anyway, girl falls hard and boy falls too. They are in this beautiful place where they can't get enough of each other. They are always chatting and tagging; laughing and teasing; hugging and kissing.

However, because it's 2015, boy doesn't quite make clear what his intentions are.

Let's all pause and think about a guy we know who does this as a habit.

[Got a name? Ok, insert the name every time you see 'he']

"It's 2015" he says, " No one makes being official a big deal. No one asks a girl out anymore. It's 2015!"

Now in boy's mind, he thinks he has a girlfriend or some derivative of a girlfriend. He thinks they have an unstated understanding of exclusivity.

Girl, on the other hand, is dying to ask the "What are we?" question but is pretty conflicted on the inside; she doesn't want to seem too desperate, she thinks she's a 2015 girl too, so she doesn't really need a statement of commitment; then there are those stupid memes that make girls who ask that question seem stupid. She really really wants to know, she needs to know but she still doesn't ask.

Their relationship begins to dwindle.  Soon, they drift but still do not quite end it officially......because of course, what's there to end?

 Here's the punch line:

Two months later, girl is engaged!

Ain't  no sunshine when she's gone....🎧 

I've heard this story, one too many times. I decided to write a post on it because I know the girl in this story is usually looked upon as a branch-swinging monkey, jumping from guy to guy, in a record amount of time, to achieve her new marital status.  I am here to defend the girl....and the guy.

To all the disgruntled men who have been ditched by this girl, please understand that this situation was beyond your control. Psych! No it wasn't! You were very much in control of this situation. In fact, everything was hinged on your decision to publicly declare that you wanted to be in a relationship with her. How easy would that have been? Say,"Would be my girlfriend?" Seriously, say it out loud. See how easy that was? Better late than never, huh?

15A.D, 2015, 2030, 2078, the Jetson-age, doesn't matter, you have to make your intentions known! We all wish you said something to her but now she's married or engaged.

......It's not warm when she's away.......🎤 

I know you are kicking yourself every night as you think about her and you're thinking about pulling an 'Adele-Hello' on her; thinking about crashing the wedding; thinking about stealing the bouquet before the ceremony starts; thinking about raising your hand during the "forever hold your peace" bit.

I sympathize genuinely, I do but she had to do what was best for her.

Bet you have some questions though like,  what happened? How did she get over you so fast? Was she dating someone before? How do you explain this sudden engagement? Is she a branch-swinging monkey? 

All these will be answered in the sequel......*drumroll*

......Ain't no sunshine when she's gone and she's always gone too long, anytime she goes away🎤 ........More like forever